Hello All,

A couple days ago I had the opportunity to do something good for some Iraqi kids, but it was more for me and what I took away from the experience was more than I bargained. One of my troops has a brother who is working toward becoming an Eagle Scout, and as a project he collected school supplies for Iraqi kids in An Nasiriyah and sent them over. Well, my trooper went on leave before all of the packages arrived and he asked if Idd help out and take the last load of them into town for him. No problem says I, I like kids.

It was a simple plan. Load up the boxes, grab an interpreter and head into town with a couple troops (max out ammo, of course), hit the school, hand out the stuff, snap some pictures and get out of Dodge. "Keep It Simple, Stupid" is an Army motto that works in huge ways and generally works for me.

Intel in this area said that Iraqi's are still friendly toward American troops and from what I've seen on duty I'd agree, but never walk into anything with your eyes closed. Extra ammo for all and a reminder that bad things happen here.

Driving into the city it looked from a distance like any other. Buildings and roads and all that, but as I got closer it really began to sink in. Iraq is a third world country. Oh, you all might know that already but I was holding on to hope that there would be some similarity between Iraq and Kuwait (that and the pictures in Stars and Stripes don't show the bad side of Baghdad). The only thing similar from Kuwait was the architecture and the color of the people's skin.

There was standing water on the streets and chaos abounded. Stop signs were ignored and the only traffic light I saw blinked green in all four directions as beaten up late models of everything rolled along the streets. The buildings were worn from neglect, war and one of the most inhospitable environments on the planet. People shuffled alongside the roads on what sidewalks were available and around the puddles (see ponds) of water left from a sewer clogged with garbage and Saddam Hussein's neglect. The smell was subtle due to a favorable wind, but it hinted at the putrid decay of a dying city.

The drive was uneventful considering the traffic conditions. It seems like people just went whatever direction on any street that they wanted, and when in Rome... so I joined the locals as part of the problem, but my hummer (see Army for 4 wheel drive Truck, a nod and a wink to my fine Italian readers) had right of way as the largest vehicle on the road.

As I pulled up to the school I saw a tremendous amount of garbage floating in the street and searched my memory for another place as filthy. In all my travels (which are not that extensive really) I have never seen anyplace quite this bad. It seems like all the residents just chuck their refuse out their windows and onto the street and pretend it's not there. The worst was the diapers. There is a five-foot wall around the school, and just outside it (where I parked) there was a pile of used and especially rank diapers. The temperature was around 50 degrees but I can only imagine how bad it will be when the temperature hits the 120's. I don't know how anyone can stand to live like that; I can only imagine that a complete loss of self respect could drive someone to live in such squalor.

The kids were beyond cute. They were captivating with saucer eyes and quiet little voices. Some knew hellos and goodbyes in English and all smiled as we handed out crayons and t-shirts; hearts melting as we wished we could do more for them. The hard part was how they begged. When we were trying to leave they swarmed the truck and begged for ANYTHING and few showed the slightest amount of pride by holding their tongues. I guess when you've got nothing you've got nothing to lose and pride can be a luxury, but it didn't sit well with me. If I heard Jake beg like that, well, I don't know what I'd do.

We returned to base without incident and what started out as a trip to make me feel good about being in Iraq had twisted into something far different. I DID feel good about helping out the kids, but I realized that this country needed a lot more help than I realized. The culture here is far different than I realized. These people live in garbage and don't bother to even throw it into a barrel and burn it. Content to let it sit in the street and fester, no one has had the initiative to start their own garbage hauling business. Then again, why would you pay someone to haul your garbage away when it sits just fine on the road?

If this is how they're content to live, I don't know if we can help these people. Democracy depends on the individuals (not all of them, you only need a few leaders to get it done) taking a personal interest in the lives of the populace, and it seems like nobody here cares. I hope I'm wrong on this.

I love you all,

Will

PS - that light seems stalled out and unmoving... sound familiar?

Hello All,

Salutes are a big deal in the Army. They are a custom that dates back to medieval times and symbolize courtesy and respect. They are reserved for officers and with good reason; officers are the educated class of the Army and are our leaders appointed by congress. They are, allegedly, a higher order of soldier and I still hope to be one when this trip is over.

However, just as the Bible says, there is a time for every season and that goes for salutes as well. The standard has always been that you don't salute officers in the field or forward areas; the reason being that snipers love to pop officers and the easiest way to identify one at a distance is to watch for salutes. Makes sense right? Always did to me and that's the way I've always trained. In fact, if an officer ever wanted a salute in the field when I was training (back in the day) I'd smile, whip one out and announce, "Sniper check, SIR!" That usually broke the offending individual (see Prima Donna) of his/her ego problem.

Well, you're never going to believe this shit. A platoon sergeant (for those that know us, he's my favorite NASCAR redneck) was walking out of the PX yesterday and walked right by a major. He didn't salute the major (wouldn't be much of a story without a point, right?).

"Soldier!" the officer called after him.

"Yes, sir?" the sergeant asked. Looking at the major's starched uniform and blocked cap he thought to himself, "This guy MUST be new around here."

"Don't you think I deserve the courtesy of a salute?"

To his credit my friend did NOT fall down laughing. He didn't even crack a smile. He thought for a moment, whipped out a fast salute and then hit the deck saying, "Sniper check, SIR!"

The best part is that the platoon sergeant remained on the ground as he explained to the officer that this is Iraq and a 'no salute zone.'

The major did not get the joke. He didn't even make the CONNECTION, and as I understand it, he didn't take it very well either. In fact, I believe that he turned beet red and marched his petulant ass to post headquarters to find out why this is a 'no salute zone.' If you think this is funny you'd be right because I think it is too. Well, I thought that it was funny until I heard that there are posts up North that ARE salute zones. Initially I called bullshit because KNB (see Paradise in Kuwait) was a 'no salute zone' and it doesn't make sense to salute in a forward area.

Apparently officers up North like being targets. I haven't heard about too many troops being killed by sniper fire so the whole salute zone might not be true, I hope not, but you never can tell with the Army.

No news on that light headed my way, and they say that no news...

I love you all,

Will

PS - It sounds like the general in charge of the Army Reserve just made the connection and is worried about retention (see Keeping Troops in Boots). You know he's gonna take the blame when it's someone else that needs a kick in the ass. I'm glad that he gets paid well.

Hello All,

Just a quick note 'cause time is a little short. Warm nights here are a bad sign. Warm air means clouds, clouds mean rain, rain means mud and mud means miseable conditions and hummers stuck. The light is getting brighter and I haven't heard a whistle... might not be a train after all.

I kinda like the weather during the day here. It's like spring back home, but it's lasting longer than 3 days (see Nebraska weather).

Jake is doing well, I'm going to be his Godfather when I get back. Right now my Dad is standing in for me, thanks Dad but I'm sure you're having a great time with the little guy.

It's about time for us to head home. Tempers are getting shorter and general attitudes aren't very good either.

I love you all,

Will

Hello All,

Well the light at the end of the tunnel is getting bigger, but I've seen that before and it ran me over. It's been raining off and on for three days and the entire camp is now a bog. Some of the tents are falling over because the stakes aren't long enough to hold in the slop with 30 mph winds. So let's talk about something besides crappy living conditions. Let's talk about stupid Army policies. Stupid? In the Army? Well stupid is as stupid does...

Stop Loss is a stupid idea. Sure it’s necessary and vital to the current mission, but it’s no way to maintain the defense of a Nation. In case you’ re not familiar (and I’m sure you are) Stop Loss is the Army policy that prevents soldiers from EST (see Army for leaving FOREVER) out of service and PCS (see Army for Not Coming Back Here, I hope) out of theater. I know what you’re thinking, "don’t you troops sign a legal and binding contract that states the length of your service?” Yep, we sure do (some schmucks do it three times) but I am told that the whole Stop Loss thing is listed in the contract.

No, I never read the WHOLE thing, ok? My first enlistment I was mostly interested in the bonus money and nervous about what I was about to do. My second enlistment I was way too hung-over (didn’t think I’d do it sober, did
you?) and my third time was right after 9/11 so I was way too motivated to care about the details. I guess the Devil really is in the details and Stop Loss is one of his creations. But I digress; I was talking about stupid ideas, not actions.

Making people continue to do a dangerous job when they want to leave is a Stupid idea. It’s bad for morale, it’s bad for the unit and it is bad for the Army. Sure it keeps us running for the time being, but how long are they gonna push this crap? And how do you expect tomorrow's soldiers to enlist when they see that a three-year hitch turns into four years or longer? Morale will suffer as those affected bitch about getting hosed. The unit will suffer because quality of work falls as the troops bitch and the Army is never going to be able to pay people enough to put up with this shit. Can you imagine a kid looking up at his brother, just home from the war saying, “I want to be just like you Johnny,” and Johnny stares down at his brother and says, “No you don’t. You want to be smart and join the Air Force.”

Another Stupid idea is what they’re doing to the NCOES, or Non-Commissioned Officer Education System (see Sergeants School). PLDC (Primary Leadership Development Course) is the first course of the NCOES and the beginning of my problem. It’s not a terribly tough time, more like a weeding out process for those who can’t learn and don’t want to put out real effort.

PLDC used to be the course you had to complete BEFORE you became a Sergeant. The Army changed the system (maybe 5 years ago) so that it was the course you needed (within a year) to KEEP your stripes. But now you must complete PLDC before your NEXT promotion (see Staff Sergeant). The alleged reason behind this move is that our troops deployed can’t rotate back to the NCOES locations to take the course. The part that is chafing my ass is that I had to earn my stripes before I got them, and I feel like the old man on the porch yelling at kids, “Why you young whippersnappers!” Maybe I’m just cranky that I had to do more than the people today. Maybe I’m dumb to think that the Army would promote someone who is unqualified for the job… nope, I KNOW that’s not the case.

But the Stupidest thing that I’ve seen (this week) is what happened today. Today I spoke with a man from the five-sided building in the D.C. area about our mission. The mission, our training, equipment and loads of other Army related stuff. He seemed genuinely concerned, asked pertinent and intelligent questions and took notes too. What’s stupid about that? Well, first off he’s a civilian contractor. Making a six figure salary. He’s a civilian contractor making a six figure salary writing a report about strengths and deficiencies which could (and should) have been passed up the Chain of Command.

The second thing about today’s meeting is who this report goes to. Allow me to tell you what I heard, “… and be sure that this report will be read. It goes directly to The Chairman…”

“Excuse me,” I said, “the chairman of what?”

“The Joint Chiefs of Staff.” And he said it with a straight face so I’m pretty sure he was serious! My brain locked and gears gound to a halt. The Joint Chiefs are the HMFIC’s (Head Mother Fuckers in Charge) of the U.S. Military. I don’t know much about The Chairman except that his name is Meyers, he reports to the President and if I ever have to stand before him I WILL be in a world of shit. But why would he need to send someone down here to get information? A civilian someone at that? Why not a young officer that needs his ticket punched with some deployment time? Why would The Chairman need to send a Spy? Doesn’t he think that he can get a “No-Bullshit” evaluation from his officers on the ground? If not, why not ask a Sergeant, or even a Private without political aims?

Civilian companies bring in contractors to help out, but from my experience they’re called Hatchet Men, and clear out the dead weight. What the hell is going on here?

I love you all,

Will

Hello All,

There is nothing like pushing a Hummer with an exhaust leak down a desolate Iraqi road on a moonless night. The grumble of the engine as you put your boot squarely in her ass as she nears top speed, squinting your eyes against the chill of the desert night and the icy fingers that creep down your neck as you watch your headlights push back the darkness. You’ve got that light in the corner of your eye, but not like you’ve heard about in movies and books. Not the light of guys that who think that they are about to get their ticket punched and toe tagged, that’s not you. The light you see tells you that no matter what happens tonight you’re going home with all your fingers and toes. You’re feeling like a Grade A Badass with your weapon hanging out the window and your buddy riding shotgun, knowing that no malnourished Hoji with a Kalashnikov or a couple of daisy-chained 60mm mortar rounds can touch you tonight. Oh hell no, tonight you’re 8 feet tall and bullet proof.

You take off your helmet, you’re not supposed to in the name of regulations, standards and knee-jerk reactions to unlucky situations, but you do it “Because.” “Because” you love the feel of the cool wind across the stubble that used to be your hair and “Because” you have armor on your Hummer, not the kind of armor that the Army is slowly putting on it’s trucks but the home made Road Warrior meets the A-Team contraption that is so Ugly, it is Beautiful. It’s tough and rugged and sharpened and mean; and it’s nothing at all that the policy makers in the Five Sided Building would approve of, but it gets the job done and that’s what matters.

No, the Army never authorized this extra protection and the bureaucrats never will. They’ll write reports and ‘coordinate’ and we’ll never see the fruits of their labor. In fact another company that is on their way here built their own armor for their unarmored trucks. Spent lots of their Own money and even got a kick-ass civilian businessman to help out with the costs, but were then told that the Army doesn’t think they should be using something home made. Oh, what a great idea! Let's not protect our troops and then be surprised when they are blown to pieces or shot full of holes. I know, let's just talk to the armor fairy and maybe she’ll spread pixie dust on our trucks and the bullets and fragments and shrapnel will just bounce off the plastic doors.

In previous wars soldiers were rewarded for improvising new ways of completing their missions and saving lives.

Maybe someone in the bureaucracy has forgotten the creed I learned as a young pup; Mission First, Soldiers Always. Pretty simple, rarely easy but the best four words to remember when it comes to leading troops (if you lead them from the Front, that is). You can have all your movie lines and political speeches and mission statements and throw them in the port-o-crapper. Accomplish your mission, and it probably won’t be pretty or easy but get the friggin’ job done. Period. Take risks, remember your commanders’ intent (i.e. why you’re there) and use some Initiative. Seems like that last part is getting micromanaged out of the Army and we are weaker for it. I would rather one of my troops did something the wrong way and learn from it rather than just sit and look at the problem until I came along and told them the right way. The problem is that so many are afraid of making a mistake they do nothing, and that is called Living In Fear. A little fear will keep you alive, too much will keep you from living.

But don’t forget about your troops. This goes to hot chow and mail call. Leave times and a listening ear. Taking personal problems offline and covering their Asses when they step on their… er, um, pride. Oh, yeah, and buying the first round of drinks or pizza on Christmas Day or anything else that might give them a lift. This is Soldiers Always. If it means that NCO ’s have to kick in 20 bucks apiece to cover the price of the Christmas Party or the Summer Picnic, then that’s what we do. We work extra hours on the paperwork so they can walk in, sign their names and get back to their jobs.

But what do I know; I’m just doing my job.

I love you all,

Will

PS – Ok, I don’t really have extra armor on my truck but when I saw one that did, this rant started brewing. The good news is that the light I saw just got a bit brighter… not gonna spill the news yet but this time it might not be a train.