Hello All,
Well, today is the 29th of April, and I'm at a place that has decent internet access. How long will I be here? Fine question, no answer as of yet. Where am I? This I can tell you. I'm at Camp Patriot in Kuwait (with the war basically over, I'm thinking that I can share a little more info with you all now) and it's a port on the Kuwaiti coast. There are all kinds of things going on here, but the important one is people going home. Am I going home soon? HA…. I doubt it, but anything is possible. But let me tell you a little about how we got here (I love adventures!)
We received orders to move out last week, and being good soldiers, developed a plan. Reconnaissance told us that there is limited living space, good food and a lot of work to get done. Cool, we split the company into two sections and sent one part to the port to secure housing and begin work while the other remained in the middle of the desert to clean up and close out our existing account with the Marines up the hill. I was with the latter team, and enjoyed a couple days of policing up (see Army term for cleaning things and putting toys away) the area and trying to pack all our stuff (always an adventure in itself) into the remaining trucks. Not a big problem, just an ass-load (that's quite a bit, even for the Army!) of work to get done. We picked up all our toys, had a little bonfire (What's the point of being on the beach without one? The Marines up the hill were none too pleased about it, but what were they going to do, bend my dog tags and send me to Kuwait?) and rolled into our new home, and this is where the stupid-ness begins.
Now, if you've been following my little rants and raves, you know that there have been quite a few stupid things happening to me since I was activated, and this place might be the straw that broke the camel's (lots of those around here, even have a racing team. Yep, and I'm not bullshiting you on this, a camel racing team) back. What's so different or intolerable about this place? Our landlord here is Navy.
I have NOTHING against the Navy, or I should say that I HAD nothing against the Navy, but I do now. The big problem here is what they call 'berthing' and I call a tent. You see, Camp Patriot is a place for Transient Soldiers, Sailors and Marines to pass thru on their way home (Good news you might think, but I'll tell you what I'm doing here in a moment, my rant isn't even begun yet!). Since everyone else here is just passing thru, they have some rules about the how, what and who of their tents. There is NO eating in the tents. There is NO fraternization (see close physical contact between the sexes) allowed anywhere on camp. NO member of the opposite sex is allowed in a tent of the opposite sex (see no girls in the boys tent). There is NO parking for trucks (see Army) on post, anywhere. NO ONE will be in the tents unless they are quietly reading, listening to headphones or sleeping (this sucks loads). Anyone caught violating these rules will stand before the Man and pull whatever shit-duty the Navy can think of (and I'll bet there’s loads of it).
Ok, let's stop and consider who I (and the other soldiers I work with) am, and what we are. We are grown ups that are capable (and we've proven this!) of looking out for our people and ourselves. We have integrated females into our unit, and they are important to our mission (really can't do this job without EVERYONE in the unit) and we like to keep them informed. This place is small enough to walk everywhere you need to go, except our parking lot, because it's in the middle of bum-fuck Kuwait, and we need to post guards there so transient people don't pilfer our stuff (thieves are everywhere). We would normally download the REALLY important stuff, but since we're living with 4-6 inches between cots and NO extra space here at all, we really can't do that, so guard duty runs around the clock. Fraternization isn't that big of a deal (I don’t have a girlfriend here, so what do I care?), but it's always nice to be able to bring females into a tent so they can get clued into what’s going on with everyone else in the platoon.
The way I see it, is that the Navy has been so beaten up by the media, congress and special interest groups (And you pukes know who you are!) about sexual harassment and equal opportunity, that they simply said, "FUCK IT!" and went to the extreme. Nobody gets to have any fun, and nobody can be trusted. Period. Now, before you start thinking that I’m a chauvinist pig that likes to harass females in a sexual manner, let me be the first to say that Female Soldiers are important and deserve respect and the same opportunities as males. But this is too much bullshit for me right now.
Oh, and why did they bring us here I'm sure you're wondering? Are we going home? Nope, you see before a truck, tank or trailer can roll back onto U.S. soil, it needs to be cleaned to USDA standards (I think I mentioned this in an earlier message) and we're here to clean the cars. Yep, we workin' at the car wash baby (insert groovy 70's song here)! Highly trained Chemical Soldiers that have years of experience and technical knowledge are washing cars…. If you're not getting the sarcasm here, think about the inflection that would be in my voice if I were talking. I'm not saying this is a waste of time, because we're helping the guys that actually fought the war go home (and that makes me feel REALLY good, they've earned the right to go home) but I do feel like I'm not being used to my potential. That and the fact that the war was basically over the day our equipment unloaded from the boat (I saw Fox News that day and troops were cruising thru downtown Baghdad like a 4th of July parade).
How long will we be here? Rumors are flying. Personally, I think that any active duty unit could be doing this job for a LOT less money than a Reserve one, but I'm not in charge here.
You might think that I'm just bitching because I'm tired and I want to go home. You'd be partially right. I am tired and since the war is over, I want to go home. There's nothing for us to do here, and even though one of our missions is washing cars, that's a different level. That's a job that's saving lives and war related-nerve gas and other especially nasty chemicals that kill in seconds. This is just dirt. I guess it's a let down, but at least we’ve got a job now. At least the Marines are leaving soon. Maybe we can go home after them.
I love you all.
Will
PS – I finally looked at the website (no access to it in Doha), and want to thank everyone that’s posting comments. I appreciate your good will (HA-Punny!) and thoughts and prayers. If you have a negative comment, that's cool too because I believe in freedom of speech, and I know that people who know better will make you feel like the ignorant little retard that you are. Nice work Mom.
Yippee.....hooorraaay....yeehaawww....finally an internet connection!!
So glad to hear you are safe and things are winding down....our thoughts and prayers are always with you all...and as I've said before, if you make your way to Seattle on your way home, look me up..I will certainly buy you a number of beers or whatever you would like!!
Stay safe and stay well....
Love to you all!!!
Will,
Hoorah!!!!! I hope you're going to be able to keep us posted more often now that you have the internet connection again. I'm sorry (and not sorry) that you didn't get to utilize your skills the way you wanted to, but you're one step closer to home! I know that makes Will's Mom happy along with sooo many of us following you on here. Take care. We'll be watching for your next post.
Godspeed.
Will,
Thank you so much for sharing your stories with us. As always, your humor and writing style leaves me smiling. I am glad you all are safe. Sorry about the car wash. Take care and keep smiling.
Posted by: Roxann on April 29, 2003 12:52 PMSo good to hear from you Will! Glad you have a stable connection from which to keep us updated. I feel land locked.. haha... I actually heard word from my boyfriend (Marine) this morning and he'll be home in July, so I got two bits of good news today! Remember as much as the Navy sucks and their rules suck... it could always be worse. Thank god you're safe :)
God bless
Posted by: Emarie on April 29, 2003 12:52 PMHope you get back on U.S. soil soon, Thank you for all that you have done, and continue to do. I enjoy reading all of your e-mails, too funny, at least you know you can always do stand up.
You guys are the best, Piss on the Protesters, where I'm from we don't listen to that kinda crap anyway.
God Bless
Tracey
I'm glad to hear you are ok, I recently visited this site and kept coming back to it ever since. Hang in there, its funny how things work out at the end.
Posted by: Paola on April 29, 2003 01:05 PMI'm glad your finally at a camp and safe now. Do you know if any for the marine corps 2nd MEB is at Camp Patriot? My husband is with the 2nd MEB, and I havent heard from him since March 14th, and I'm very worried. So, if you could I would love it if you had any info on that. And dont worry, I'm sure you'll get to go home soon. Thank you!! melissa
Posted by: Melissa on April 29, 2003 01:22 PMWill,
I really like reading your posts.
I am so glad that you are safe.
The active duty always uses us reserves and the gurad for the clean up stuff, one of these days they will realize that the guard and reserves are just as good as the active duty if not better.
Jan
Posted by: Jan on April 29, 2003 01:27 PMHi Will;
Glad you have "the connection" again. This way you can reach out and keep us informed. (bet you thought I would say touch) but that would not be politically correct, considering that the Navy is in charge right now.
Remember "Wax On---Wax Off" this will make you good and strong. Keep smiling, (the Navy will wonder what you have been doing) and know that we will keep praying for you. Glad to know your doing okay. I hope you get sent home soon, and you can do your tour of "America" sounds like everyone wants to buy you a beer. Count me in too. Take care.
debby
Posted by: debby on April 29, 2003 01:37 PMTHANK GOD!!!! I hope you all get home safe, sound and soon! Thank you all for doing all that you do to preserve our freedom! Will, tell your mom I want the book (she knows, the one she is going to write), and you are welcome to cruise by the DFW area at any time, the beer is on me! BTW, when are you signing your book deal?
hugs,
penny
Will,
Gee---It's good to finally hear from you! Although you feel that you ain't nothing but a car washer...just be thankful you are alive and standing in line to hopefully come home! The amount of support you have recieved through this website is truly amazing. Along with all of our local soldiers we included you in our prayers. Just because we have never met you doesn't mean that we don't care. WE Thank God for our brave soldiers and have shed tears for those who lost their life...but realize and know it was for a good cause. God Bless and Hurry Home! Your family misses you!
Kelley
Poncho huh? Will not be able to look at another and not laugh at what a site you must have been. Hope it was big enough to cover all your asssssssssssets. Good to hear your in some what good spirits. And can keep in touch with your Mom. Mom's always worry you know. Take care and look at the bright side the count down is on you'll be coming home soon. Safe & sound. Hope you have take pictures they will add to your book.
Posted by: Chris on April 29, 2003 02:10 PMHmmmm....uhmmm, Will?
I never offered you a beer...just a homecooked dinner. *girns* Now I'm feeling a bit negligent...do you want a beer too?? That's no problem, just tell me what kind. (See PICK YOUR FLAVOR)
Though your accomodations and 'job' appear to be crappy, (See NAVY RULES) at least you're in a safe, albeit, boring, place.
Will, your mom has kept your site going and has done a wonderful job..you owe her a huge hug just for that! *winks at 'mom'* Hmmmm...Kuwait, eh? Marines you say? I wonder if perchance you've run across Ken!? (See HOW MANY TROOPS ARE THERE-SAY, SEVERAL THOUSAND?)
Buddy, you just keep a'washing those vehicles and then get your sarcastic butt home!
FRATENIZATION???? Say it isn't so! So, uh, if you DID have a girlfriend there, you'd be breaking 'the rules' and fratenizing with her???? OMG say it isn't so, Will!! *laughing so hard I choked on my water* I could be wrong, but I don't think I am; I perceive you could use some fratenization right about NOW, eh? *mouth drops open in shock* If you had a choice between 'fratenization' and a cigarette, which would win? (No, 'fratenization" THEN a cigarette was not a choice!)
Hahahahahhaaha
GODSPEED, MY DEAR WILL......
Judi - Tucson, Arizona
Will,
Great to hear that you're safe and sound, even if it seems that they want you living in individual plastic bubbles (see body condom). My dad is a Navy Vet (some great stories as you can imagine), I'll have to see what he says about these rules. I'm sure it was a lot different 'back in the day'.
I can't get a funny picture out of my head... The 70s music (see really bad, used in questionable movies with little dialogue), soldiers in 70s style clothing (retro? some things should be left in the past), water, sand, camels...
Anyway, I think you owe your mom a bottle of Dom when you get home. She was very kind to keep us (internet peeping Toms) updated when you couldn't and even though you're 'safe' I'm sure she'll still worry until she sees you for herself. I'll keep my fingers crossed that that's soon.
I hope you can keep writing, or those of us that have been reading may experience withdrawal. You should seriously consider a book when back in the US!
Take care and tell everyone that we're behind them all the way. You better start walking and talking, that's a tall order!
Kathy
Posted by: Kathy on April 29, 2003 04:09 PMHi Will,
I'm very new to this site. And I just want to tell you thank you for everything!!! Your stories are amazing, and I was laughing through the whole thing!! You and all out there are sacrificing for all of us at home, and we are so thankful and grateful!!
Nothing we say or do will ever compare to what your doing, even though you think car washing isn't much, IT IS!! Every job counts! I'm so glad to hear that you are safe, even though you got wet a few times.
Please keep on writing, we all look forward to your stories (rants and raves).
I wish you all well, and pray for all, for a safe return home!
How's it hangin' Will,
I've been reading your posts for the last couple and you keep crackin' up every time. I have a really good friend who's a reservist too so reading your posts are really helping me out. (BIG UPS TO WILL'S MOM) They sound like the type of stories he would tell me if the phone reception wasn't so bad.
As for the fratenization thing I get it now. I asked about the chicks over there, but he said it just wasn't worth it. You guys must been in the same group because he mentioned early last week he was goin' to be on the move again. So if you see a Slim Shady lookin' dude from South FLA give him a node for me.
Stay safe...and uh...don't forget the tires.
Maggie from South FLA
Posted by: Maggie on April 29, 2003 08:42 PMWill
It's nice hearing from you again. Glad all is well (considering the circumstances). Happy belated Birthday!!!! :) :) Hope u got to enjoy it. (even if it was a fleeting moment). I've got a cake waiting 4 ya. So many admirers u have. How r u going to handle all of your fame? Some (such as myself) anxiously waits for your postings. Relieved when we hear/read everything is ok. You are in many thoughts and prayers. If u need anything, I'm just a click away.
LOL
Judi - you are too funny because that is EXACTLY what Will would want (his cake and eat it too).
Will - too bad you didn't have all this car-washing experience last year when you could have put it on a resume. Of course if D keeps the "Waddler whose brother's middle name is Michael" on board, it could still come in handy.
We celebrated the big 30 for you with pizza, beers and a big cookie (not quite the big sandwich but it will do). Looking forward to round #2 when you can join us.
Until then, workin' at the car wash....work, work. Yeah, there's a song I want stuck in my head the rest of the night you bastard!!
p.s. kudos to you too Rooba for helping us keep in touch with the boy. thanks
Posted by: Shell on April 29, 2003 10:30 PMAs always,it's good to hear you're safe and sound. Things could be worse even if the Navy has strict rules. You cant blame them. Get all of 'em tanks and other vehicles clean and get your butts home! I know ya dont like doing it but it'll help other troops get home to their families and eventually,you can come home too. Keep your chin up and continue with your funny (and sarcastic) attitude.
Godspeed.
Posted by: Jennifer from Mn on April 29, 2003 11:48 PMHi Will!
I'm glad to read that you have an Internet connection. So will you give us news more often!?Yeah!
As I read you made another little step to back home..We hope it will happen as soon as possible!
I want to tell you a thing I've just made: I printed the american flag and i will hang it to the hall in front of my bed.
And you could say: why only now and not before?I can answer that it' s always a demonstraction of respect and gratefulness for you! And i'm proud to do this.
Yes Yes Yes!
Stay safe and write us soon.
Love, Ilenia
Will, great to hear things are winding down (although it doesn't sound as if they ever really got going for you and your team, but at least it kept you all safe!). Keep writing, I won't pass a car wash or tent without thinking of you!!
Posted by: becky on April 30, 2003 06:27 AMI am so happy to hear your in GREAT spirits! Will, what would we do without you? You've kept us informed and entertained. I hope you and the rest of our boys are able to come home soon!
Keep smiling!
God Bless,
Stacey
Will,
Good to hear you're doing well and doing something to pass the time. Even though its not your job, I guess its better that you're washing down cars and tanks rather that chemically scared marines or locals right? I think so anyway. Take care and keep us informed soldier! That's an order! :)
-Ryan
Hi Will!
So glad to hear from you again! Sorry to hear that the Navy seems to think that everyone has to be treated like babies. They need a reality check! And this coming form a Naval Reservist with 7 years in Reserves and 8 1/2 active duty! I agree with what you said about the Navy being so spooked by all those nasty sex scandals. I was active duty when Tailhook happened. Your sense of humor is great! I'm looking forward to seeing your book come out. It'll be sure to be a bestseller. You're always in my prayers. Keep on truckin and stay safe. God bless you. If you ever get to Menasha, Wisconsin, I'll buy you as much beer as you want.
hi, will. glad to hear you're hanging in there. Keep us informed when you get a chance~~it's comforting to us waiting at home to hear that the conditions aren't as bad as our imaginations sometimes tell us it is. hey--if you come across a marine named glenn wright from ft. wayne, indiana give him a big hello from the snyder's and let him know we're doing all we can to keep the home fires burning. thanx.
You take care now honey and i'll be praying for you. keep writing!!!
Kris
p.s. couldn't ya post a pix of you wearing nuttin' but your poncho?? us ladies out here in cyber space would LOVE it. take care.
Hey Will
Nice to know you appreciate all the good bits of the bad bits ;) You will be back on Conus soil soon- unless u get a stop-over somewhere like here. But actually I am anxious to visit my Conus soil myself!
Looks like u have plenty of g/fs to choose from who love reading your posts...
Take care Honey
Glad to hear you're safe and hopefully coming home soon! Just a thought, but maybe you could wash those cars in the poncho and birthday suit you mentioned earlier!!! I bet the girls would break the rules and come on over to the boy's tent then!!! ;) Be safe and know that our prayers and thoughts are with you all!! We love you guys!!!
~Samantha
I HAVE ENJOYED YOUR POSTS AND HOPE TO KEEP READING THEM. MY HUSBAND IS IN THE GUARD AND JUST ARRIVED IN KUWAIT
FOR HIS TOUR OF DUTY. I HAVE SHARED YOUR INSIGHTS INTO LIFE IN THE DESERT WITH HIM AND WE HAVE BOTH LAUGHED.
STAY SAFE!
Will,
Good to see you're healthy an in good spirits. Stay safe.
Wish my kid could get internet access over there.. He wrote that he was at the mercy of the Signal Corps. Geeks, that was April 8th, his last letter.
He was waiting at Camp Virginia with the 814th Replacement Company, didn't know what outfit he'd be riding with.
You take care and God Bless.
The Chief
(MadDog)
Wars always suck whether we come out ahead politically or not. Nam had as much fun as your war and a bit of dying and the higher-ups doing the same kind of bull. I love your site it brings back many memories. I was a combat infantryman who got to carry a prc-25 in 69-70. Keep up the fine work. I hope the mail can find you now. It used to be the most joyous of occasions no matter who got mail. Good Luck
Posted by: Charlie W on May 1, 2003 09:27 PMHi Will.
Good to know things are moving forward. War is practically over and I am begging to loose my patience to wait my bf to be home. I know there are still important work to do and all solders are more eager to see their loved one than ones who wait. My bf can't contact me often like you can post so I am reading your web site to understand how things are going in over there. And you do ease my mind a lot. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feeling with us. Really appreciated. Oh, I also think it will save money if they let Reserve ones go home soon (so my bf could be home !!) =) But that would be just my selfish request ....
Hope your can be home soon, too.
Posted by: N on May 1, 2003 10:44 PMHi Will,
WAR IS OVER!! As the President Bush said this night.
Hoping, you will be back homme soon,
with love, Ilenia
Posted by: Ilenia on May 2, 2003 05:13 AMHi Will,
You have read our messages at last.
It’s beautiful to have a correspondence with you.
We would like have a friendship with you.
Perhaps one day we meet us, also if there is a ocean that we separate.
‘We are strong and we want well, and we are simple, and all is natural for us.
We want be strong and we want don’t drown in the entangle stranges.
We want be spiritually strong, and simple and heal and we want well us
because we want well us and this is thing very nice and very great
and very strong reason of the world.’
With love, three girls from Milan
Hi Will,
Happy belated birthday! You didn't tell us about your birthday. How was it? Waiting to hear about that one. Your missives are such a hoot to read at work when it is 0200 and we're trying to stay awake.
I wouldn't throw away your PPE just yet. Stay safe and keep writing.
Prayers from Va. Beach
Posted by: Williams family on May 3, 2003 04:14 AMпусть пакарает вас всевышний иуды вы которые будите гореть в гиене огня лицемеры .вы умрёте в своей политике и живёте как обезьяне как сказано в святом Каране.
Posted by: yustas on May 13, 2003 06:12 PMYustas Translation via Altavista Babelfish
let pakarayet you Most High of Judas you which wake to burn in the hyena of fire/light persons vy you will die in your policy you live as to monkey as said in the holy carane
Posted by: . on May 13, 2003 06:49 PM
Will is a pretty good writer and this is the collection of his writings. It'll be interesting to hear updates from a soldier's point of view, so I'll be posting them for all to read.
Take care Will