Hello All,
Greetings from hot, sandy and really smelly Kuwait. I know that during my last tirade I bitched and moaned a little, and I apologize for that, because I have come to accept my fate in this place of Naval Retardation. What helped me find this balance between the logical and the absurd? Well, lets just say that I just can't be pissed off any more.
Not pissed off anymore, how can he do that? This man that loves to rant and rave. The man that hates idiotic actions and the ineptitude that inspires them? Yep, me. What happened? Well, I took a hard look around, weighed my options, and thought to myself, is this really worth bitching about? Yep, psych!
HA, I'll bet that I had you going there, didn't I? Today's list of complaints stems from the travel restrictions. Not that I can't go anywhere, because there is no place in Kuwait that I want to visit and say, "I was there", except for the airport, that is. There's a rumor going around that Bahrain allows alcohol, but I have no idea how to get there, and doubt that I could find my way back with a hangover. That would probably get me detained in the stockade, and kept here even longer, so I guess I'll just be a good boy and wait my turn for the freedom bird home. Back to the rant in progress...
I should probably specify that I'm not exactly perturbed about the gear required to wear when exiting the camp that I now call home. It's the fact that I'm looking forward to NOT wearing all this stuff when I get home. Also, I don't want too many people being confused by the President's statement about hostilities being finished here in the middle-east - while the official war is over, bad things/people still remain. That is the reason that when I drive off this post I am wearing a Kevlar Helmet, Body Armour, Full Canteens, a days worth of food (see MRE, yummy) and as much ammo as I can get hold of. Why would I need all this equipment if the war is over and peace is breaking out all over? Well, terrorists are friggin' everywhere, and we can't be too careful, especially since I'm due to be home any year now. It would suck mightily if I were to get zapped after the war by some Zealot that can't read and believes everything that he's told.
I'm not terribly worried about getting zapped by a terrorist. I've had some training on the creepy little bastards and have a basic understanding on how they work, and who they want to kill, and I'm not that guy. Terrorists want high-ranking people to shoot that will make them famous in a weird John Hinkley (the guy that shot President Regan because he thought that if he did Jodie Foster would want to go out with him, for all of you that can't remember) way. I guess they hope to instill fear that they can get anyone if they can get someone powerful or famous, and since I'm neither powerful nor famous, I should be good. Unless they're having a bad week and just wanna pop an American, and then I'm gonna have to shoot back (good thing that I can shoot, even with General Winter biting me in the ass!).
Looks like it's time to get some chow and sleep, I'm working the car wash from Midnight to 0600 (6am for all you lucky, and cool civilians).
Love,
Will
PS - Next time I'll write you about the Mosque and the good Reverend's need for a rhythm section.
Hey Will, glad to hear your not pissed anymore, maybe now your days will go by a little smoother, even at the car wash:) Sincerely, Melissa
Posted by: Melissa on May 3, 2003 11:45 AMWill, great to hear from you so soon! You have definitely been in the desert too long: you are beginning to sound philosophical (or is that just now due to your venerable old age?) Stay safe, you may be more famous than you realise!!!! (do you have any idea how many people are eager to hear your rantings? It's what keeps us sane!)
Posted by: becky on May 3, 2003 11:57 AMHey there Will! I'm not a personal friend...but I have been following your rantings and ravings for quite the while now. You have been providing me with some much needed comic relief with your posts, and for that I thank you! My boyfriend is one of the Marines over there that you enjoy razzing so much. Hilarious to see that you Army guys talk about them in much the same way they talk about the Army. Keep it up Will, and keep yourself safe over there! You have my prayers and my laughter. Have fun washing those vehicles now! Hope to see you all home soon.
-Mel-
Hey, great hearing from you and knowing how it goes there. Still praying for you all over there in knowing you are still not in the USA. God Bless America and all you guys in the service for our country. Take care. With prayers and more prayers, Sue
Posted by: Sue on May 3, 2003 03:43 PMI can't stay away from you Will.
Posted by: Scarlett on May 3, 2003 08:14 PMExcuse me, please and let me a break ... to look for a prayer from you:
My deeper pain for the homicide committed by Bush's madnesses, Blair and Aznar in the person of Salam Pax (http: // dear_raed.blogspot.com/). Mourning in Internet for the "wild" journalist, Salam Pax.
I love your posts! Glad you're still well, and keeping your sense of humor..still..you have an enormous talent. I'm thankful you've given us an inside look at what's happening..
Posted by: Troi on May 3, 2003 11:07 PMWill, Will, Will.....*shakes head while eyeing you* you cannot fool me with your pittance of remorse!!!!! Such foolery, to pretend to lean towards resignation!! I know you better, Will! *laughs heartily* (See METHINKS YOU'RE FEELING FRISKY)
Good idea to leave the partying until getting CONUS...who knows what you'd end up cozying up to in Kuwait!!! *mouth drops open in shock* It can't be THAT long before you're home, can it? They wouldn't keep our Will from his hordes of adoring fans, would they? (See INSENSITIVE AUTHORITIES)
Liking those MRE's, eh Will? *chuckles* I'll trade you prison food for MREs anyday! *shudders* I've tasted those MREs, dude....and I must say that prison food outruns MREs for lackluster, tasteless, el crapo everytime. Ahhh, for the day I quit working at the prisons...(See TOASTING THE LEAVING PRISON WORK)
BUZZZZZZZZZZZ Oh oh,....Will!!! It's 2345!!!! Time to wash the vehicles!!! Hup, hup, hup, double time it, soldier!!!!! (See MOVE IT, SOLDIER) Hahahahaha..sorry Will....didn't mean to shock you awake....just couldn't resist it!
Hugs, Prayers, and Godspeed Will...
Judi Eckes - Tucson, Arizona
Oh now WIll!! Now I have that "Car Wash" (70's tune) stuck in my head!! ugh! Thanks for keeping us updated. Good luck and hurry home.
Caligirl
A fan in California
Hi Will,
Great missive. Don't go looking for the alcohol. (Remember the toilet seats?Why would you trust your mouth and gut to something worse?) Remember, their CDC was looted and you have several nasties running amuck. I'd hate for someone to put something in your drink (can you say Ebola?).
The cars aren't sooo bad. It's the tanks that are a real bear. Watch out for the tread.
Prayers of safety to you from Va. Beach.
Posted by: Williams Family on May 4, 2003 04:30 AMLove reading your posts. They really are keeping me laughing. Hope you get home soon!
Posted by: ERIN on May 4, 2003 06:07 PMHi Will,
Greetings from Wisconsin. Great to hear from you again. I find myself really looking forward to your posts. It's pretty cool that you have such a wonderful sense of humor. I check your blog every day. Keep the faith, and stay safe.
Love hearing from you, Will. Makes my day when there is an update in my e-mail. :-) Keep yourself safe over there--I know the area isn't totally safe yet but thanks to the hard-working military folks like yourself it will be soon.
We are proud of our military and can't thank y'all enough for your sacrifice and dedication. Hope you can get a leave soon so you can enjoy some good old American food and drink(see pizza and a Budweiser).
As always--prayers and good thoughts going your way. Kris
I am glad to hear your sence of humor is not been tarnished. I hope you are on your way home soon. B/c my car needs a good washing!haha I hope for the best and your safe return!
Renae, Houston TX
Will
Your posts are amazing. Thanks for keeping everyone informed. I have a neighbor who is at Camp Patriot with you, but he is one of the Marines that you so love!!! Keep up the good work. Get home safe. THANK YOU!
Becky-Illinois
Love your good spirit! I'm a huge fan, keep up the good work. We all hope that you will be home very very soon. Love and prayers to you all.
Posted by: Mary on May 5, 2003 11:34 AMLOL, omg I love reading your posts. I don't know if you can swear on here, and most people who respond are very nice and stuff but I just have to say: you're so fucking funny. I love your posts. You better become a writer when you get back and write some good fucking book about all your hilarious times in the service and your unique view on it all. It's just too good an idea to pass up! Get with it man! Go be a lazy good for nothing writer and make a crap load of money! What are you waiting for???!!!!111
Posted by: Ryan on May 5, 2003 12:43 PMWill, Good to hear from you again and glad to know you are safe. I come here daily to read your rants. I pray for your safe return home SOON! Take Care and Hope to hear from you again soon.
Kelley
Posted by: Kelley in Iowa on May 6, 2003 02:02 PMHey Will,
Glad to hear that through it all your wit and sarcasm are fully in tact. It's a beautiful gift to make people laugh with you instead of just at you!
Take care and try to have some fun, you know, ride a camel or something...
Kathy
Hey Will....so good to hear from you again..what can I say, can't stop looking for your posts daily!! (obvioulsly, me and a lot of other adoring fans!!)
The USS Abraham Lincoln made it home today to a crowd of more than 20,000 people....wives, husbands, mothers, wives, children, supporters adoring balloons, banners and streamers like you can't believe!! I'm so proud of us right now...I cried all the way into work listening to it on the radio...big parade planned for them on Thursday...I WILL be there!! We're going to the local pub Thurs night to buy some soldiers a drink...we will cheers to you my friend and all you guys still over there....wish you were one of them here now..but soon enough, you will be home!!
Take care......
Posted by: Sharon on May 6, 2003 04:56 PMHI Will!
Another update from you: great!
I'm reading from others'comments that all american are waiting for you came to home!
Pheraps it let to take myself from the enthusiasm when i listened the magic phrase: war is over! Infact, you say that bad things and people remains...and the terrorism too.
This is the reason for that i will thank you always in the future, for every time that you'll protect us from violence, kamize....
Now i want to be optimistic and my best wish that you return home soon remains!!
love, Ilenia
Posted by: Ilenia on May 7, 2003 05:54 AMHey Will, good to hear from you. My son left to Kuwait last Friday and he called from somewhere in Kuwait on Monday. Look out for him his amy name is Sgt Garces, his civilain name is Ricardo Garces (Rick for short) he is with the 1161st Transportation company (National Guard) don't know what other units they may be attached to. If you run into him tell him I posted a note here. All of you take care and hurry back home. If you are ever in Washington state stop by and say hi. We live in a small town called Quincy WA. locate smack in the middle of Washington state on I-90. Just stop by the local Sports Bar and ask for Baldemar Garces.
Good luck and our prayers are with all of you.
Posted by: Daddy G on May 7, 2003 12:42 PMDaddy G - good luck and prayers to you and your family also as Rick completes his mission in Kuwait.
Am sure if there is a sports bar smack dab in the middle of anywhere, Will could find it.
Hi Will,
that difficult translate and write!
You apoligize for our english doesn't correct much.Are you bored?Smile:-)!We have a joke for you.'Adam went to God and asked him:Can I a question?God answers:tell me.Adam:Why you have done Eva very beautiful?God answers:because you love her.Adam:why you have done her very stupid?God:because she love you.
With love three girls from Milan,Italy
Milena,Ilaria,Adriana
Hi,Will,
I enjoyed reading your bio and your stories very much, lots of humor. I was killing myself laughing.
My name is Judy, I'm from Toronto, Canada. We used to live in Subic Naval Base many years ago. Numerous family members are in the U.S.Military, few of them still in Iraq hoping them to be home soon. I know how it feels to be away from home, family and friends. Please pass on my e-mail address to anyone who may need a friend. It is very little and simple thing I can do to show support for our Troops, simple thing coming from big heart of mine. Thank you, take care and GOD BLESS, to you and the troops.
Join the Linux community.
Posted by: Matilda on July 6, 2004 02:09 PM
Will is a pretty good writer and this is the collection of his writings. It'll be interesting to hear updates from a soldier's point of view, so I'll be posting them for all to read.
Take care Will